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The art
of beating depression
Chapter 1: A new beginning
Depression is one of the toughest things in life to
overcome. It is generally caused by stress and unwanted
thoughts. I know from experience that it is no fun. I am 31
and just now came out of the worst depression of my life.
The biggest part of my depression was that I felt like a
failure. I started a business and it wasn’t going so good. I
wasn’t hitting my goals, and life was getting hard. It was
causing my wife and me with a lot of undo stress. It’s hard
to explain the thoughts that go though your head during
depression. You know what is wrong with your life, and you
know how to fix it. It’s just that you don’t care. When you
don’t care about anything, you’re not able to be rational
about anything. That is the mind set that I had at the low
point. However, I found the light at the end of the tunnel.
I was
lying in bed when the most amazing thought crossed my mind.
I was thinking about my life and all the things that I
didn’t do. It was then that I realized that I have not
accomplished any of the things I wanted to do in life.
Moreover, I didn’t even know who I was any more. I had tried
to change my whole life to fit that of others. I had molded
myself to a life that was not mine and my mind could not
handle it. It knew better. Too bad the conscious and the
sub-conscious could not have had better communication!
I know
that you can’t just change your life in minutes. However,
you can make that realization that you have made a mistake
and at that moment, the changes can begin to be made. I
watched a movie called “The Secret”. Now this movie talks
about life and our perceptions of it. What we think, be
manifest. I thought about this for days and decided that I
would no longer manifest thoughts of failure, but success.
Even though I had not found it, I still had the feeling that
I was a success. Then I got out a piece of paper and began
to write down all the things that I was great full for. As
they say, once you hit the bottom, there is nowhere to go
but up. And so I go up!
Step 1: Understand and love yourself.
I cannot
stress this enough. You must love being you. There is no one
like you and you have to accept and love who you are or you
will never be happy. That is the simple truth. There is no
other way to put it. This was my first and biggest mistake.
I didn’t love me and so I could not love life or others.
Step 2: You cannot change people
The only
way that a person can change is through their own actions.
It has to be a choice that they make. You cannot make it for
them. When you will your mind on others, you create
resistance. The human mind hates resistance. It fights it
like a disease. You don’t have to accept or even condone
the actions of others, but understand that you cannot change
them. You can help guide and influence them but that is all.
In the end, they must make the choice.
Step 3: Follow your heart.
You heart
is your guide. When you are not doing what you know is
right, your heart tells you. When you ignore it, your heart
tells your mind and your mind begins to break down the body.
It’s not to punish you. Rather, it is to show you that
something is wrong with your life. It is trying to get your
attention. Cancer, disease, sickness, and stress are all
causes of your mind trying to tell you something. You have
to be willing to listen and make the changes in your life to
cure the body.
Step 4: Go forth and repair your life.
This, by
far, is the hardest step to take. This is the step that has
all the cost. If it is your job that is wrong, you have to
get a different one. If it is your spouse that is wrong, you
have to do something about it. For me, it was more than one
thing. It was my spouse, my job, my house, my this, my that
and all of these things had to change. It was my entire
mindset. I felt as though nothing in my life was right. When
you have kids, you have to be strong for them. How can you
be strong when everything is wrong? So I changed the way I
looked at life.
First I
changed the way I thought about myself. Instead of being
unworthy, I started thinking that I was more than worthy of
anything this life could offer. Second, I started believing
and feeling that I was successful. I started feeling as
though money would come frequently and easily. Third, I
began to focus on the things in life that I was grateful
for. When I started to do all of this, I began to see those
things manifest in my life. I started making more money. I
was spending more quality time with the kids. I began to fix
up the house and take pride in what I had earned. As I
continued to do this, the feeling of success and love began
to grow like a virus. No matter what happens in life, there
is always and answer. That answer is perception. For what
you believe, so it is true. The universe has a funny way of
answering you even when you’re not paying attention.
Step 5:
Continue to be grateful.
I cannot
stress this enough. When things in our life are good, it is
easy to forget to be grateful. That is one of the corks of
life. We neglect the little things so often that they become
big things. We must continue to focus on the good of life
and never the negative. I keep a gratitude rock in my pocket
at all times. When I watched the movie “The Secret”, a man
kept a rock with him. This rock would remind him to be
thankful for everything he had. Every morning, he would hold
the rock and list the things that he was thankful for. Then
in the evening when he pulled out the rock, again he would
list the things he was thankful for. It was such a good idea
that I adopted it and use it each and every day. It does not
have to be a rock. It can be anything that is special to
you. A ring or a button also work fine.
Step 6:
Bless others as you are blessed.
You have
to share your success with others. It is one of the
fundamental rules of humanity. List one person in the world
that shares their wealth with others freely and without
repayment. Wealth is not just having a lot of money. It is
money, love, happiness, success and the like. If your wealth
is writing, then share it with the world. This is what I
like to do. I don’t have a ton of money, but I have a ton of
knowledge. This knowledge is worth much more to me that any
amount of money can ever be. So I share it freely with the
world. I do not expect to change the world. I would like to
think that I could help change the perception of just one
person. If I can do that, then I am far more successful than
a rich man that hordes his money.
In
summery, you are who you believe yourself to be and nothing
more. Remember to be grateful and love yourself. Once you do
that, the world is your playground. Share your wealth with
everyone that you run across.
Read Step
chapter 2 here
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